Thursday, December 15, 2005

Back on track!

Another fantastic review of the work today, and much needed before I take my vacation next week. I'll be preparing for my move, and doing all the prework surrounding that. Writing during a period of change sometimes can be frustrating, but as I've always said, all things happen for a reason - and this can only aid the process.

The feedback of course, was fantastic. Thank you! I had many of my own questions answered about the story, the perception of the reader, the integration of multiple story lines, and the overall impressions each character gives. Excellent, and I'm excited. Chapter 15 is scheduled for completion by the end of the weekend, or early next week at the latest. Very interesting interactions will be taking place that I'm excited about. More to come!


Yesterday was a difficult process. I attempted to watch a movie to get me to visualize certain aspects of my story, but the movie turned out to be uninspired, and all too typical, what I saw of it anyway, as I passed out on the couch. Still trying to recover from this cold I'm fighting off. But despite that, I got some further work done with the Antagonist of the story. My body seems to be taking on the depletion, and depression of the character I'm currently writing, the process is interesting but is not without it's torment.

The character is undergoing a transformation, and is experiencing loss of physical / self image, and coming to grips with what he has become. I wrote another thousand words or so, and got some interesting interactions with some subordinate characters, and explained some of the links in the Antagonists past. This chapter is proving to be difficult, as his nature is not my own, so the authenticity is extremely important. However, like some subconscious method actor, I seem to be taking on my characters form. And as this book has been about 1.5 to 2 years in the making, I can definitely look back and see how my different states of mind have switched depending on the chapter I'm writing. I don't know if that is life imitating art, or art imitating life. But regardless I've stayed true to each characters emotional states, and the quality of the story is of utmost importance to me. I want this to be a story I'd love to read, and read often. Something that intrigues me, and perhaps my readers as well.

I believe the connections to the Antagonists past will be interesting, as they were to me. Some might ask, how do you not know? Why would you be excited or interested in what you've written? Do you not know how the story will form? And the short answer is yes... At a high level. But I prefer using the revelation methodology of writing, which essentially means the ending of the story, or how it all ties together is as much a surprise to me, as to the reader. That seems to keep me going, because if I approach it as a I would a Process, or a Project, it seems to detach me a bit from the experience. I do both really... and that's the best way to produce quality work, with a balance of Right and Left brained approaches, being creative, but pulling back a bit to incorporate the Left brain in the co-ordination, authenticity, and continuity process. The journey continues.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005


I'm at a weird place right now with my writing. I have inspiration in many ways, and have recieved tremendous encouragement over the last few days. But my body doesn't seem to want to co-operate, I'm feeling sick, my entire family is up stairs... now best friends with their kleenex, and I'm using what little time I have to put towards this process.

But is all it takes information, and inspiration? Doesn't it take bodily energy, the right emotional state, and access to some kind of flow? I've been grabbing ideas out of the air over the last couple days, as my unconcious mind attemps to round out the rest of the story. I pose a question, and sometime later, I may get an answer... that somehow pops into my mind. I write it down, and try to 'get out' every drop of that insight before the feeling passes. It's so fleeting, like a subtle energy that washes over you, whispering an idea, that just might slip away if you don't move fast enough. But you don't want to engage your mind too much when that happens, or you stop the flow... or direct it somewhere else, and lose it. That's why creative work sometimes seems like you're channeling... often you might here people say that the book wrote itself. Well this is probably the phenomenon they're referencing. It's what happens when you're being creative, and it flows from your centre, and pours out, like a rose releasing a fresh fragrance. Sometimes that channeled energy can just gush out of you, and other times it's just a trickle. But it's that centre that you look for to be in that creative space. That's the type of zone I like to be in when I'm writing, and sometimes it takes some time to get there. Of course, the good thing is that doing research doesn't necessarily require that state of mind, and often times contemplation about the research can get you to that state. In itself, this journal entry is an effort of contemplation, about the process, about the work, about my inspiration.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

What is inner peace?

Inner peace is a process, not a result. Inner peace is something that is worked towards, something that is consciously chosen. Your first question should be, "Do I want to experience inner peace?", and perhaps your next should be "What is it like to experience inner peace?" Depending on who you are, the order of those questions might be reversed.

What is it like to experience inner peace? - Inner peace is powerful, it is calming, it is tranquil. It is a place where you can go at any time, and connect with what has been referred to as "the silence". In the silence, there is a knowing that occurs. A knowing that you are WHO YOU ARE. And Who you are is much more than who you appear to be. The peace that is found in this inner space, is a place of unlimited potential. Free of Ego attachments, free of emotional attachments, free of physical attachments to any outcomes that might occur in ANY situation. What does this really mean though? This means that you are no longer a leaf in the wind, responding or reacting to situations as they occur, and allowing those situations to determine how you feel. For example, a close friend or family member dies. What are the immediate emotions one would associate with that type of experience.

1) Loss
2) Pain
3) Anger

And eventually you'd learn to accept "what is" and move on. Sometimes a process that can take years for some, or minutes for others. I prefer efficiency as opposed to allowing emotions to drag on for extended periods of time, thus impacting many other facets of my life. This works for me, it may not work for you - but it can if you decide it will.

Going into an inner space allows you to do something, it allows you to connect with a "Beingness", a simple and functional human being... existing as they are, with no need for change. What do I mean by that? Well how often have you thought to yourself, I wish I was that guy, or I wish I was rich, or I want that new Porsche, or I need/want to be different somehow? Think about this... Does a flower contemplate itself in relation to others? Does it say why am I not as tall as the other flowers? Does it ask why am I not a tree? It simply is what it is... a rose. Is that rose any less beautiful because it is one inch shorter than another flower? In my opinion... no. It is beautiful regardless, because that is it's true nature.

What is your true nature? You are human, with all of your brilliance, all of your faults, all of your quirks, and all of your experience. Simply be who you are, and trust that who you are is exactly who you're supposed to be. Just as the rose is exactly what it is supposed to be. This sense of knowing that you are exactly what you are supposed to be, right here and now... is very powerful. This understanding is HOW to be in a state of peace. Knowing intrinsically that nothing needs to change, and you are exactly as you should be in this moment of NOW. However that doesn't mean that you don't change in every moment of now... we are always changing, quite literally evolving even at a microscopic level.

But now the question is what is your motivation? Is it to acquire more wealth, or to have a more abundant experience? Is it a wanting for something more, or a desire for a new experience? The change in perspective is key... Because a studious desire for new experience is mind expanding... a wanting for something specific, especially materialism is myopic, and closed minded. You will have infinitely more success with an open mind, ear, and heart, than if they're closed.

When do you know if you've achieved inner peace? - You'll know. When nothing from this material world, be it a death, a birth, an argument, a joke... nothing from the wide range of human experience can move you from your place of peace. Can move you from your place of serenity, or your position of power. What does this position of power do for you? It allows you to CHOOSE exactly when and how you will experience ANY situation... exactly what type of emotions you'll engage, how much, and how often. Do you like joy / love / laughter? Then choose them! All the time. Don't let life decide for you... they are happening simply to allow you to first know what it's like, then to decide which ones you want to experience! Instead of being the leaf in the wind, at the mercy of fate... be the wind itself and decide where you want to go.

Do I want to experience inner peace? - This question pertains to the humans ability to delve back into old behavioural patterns, which is why inner peace is a process, not a destination. We've all experienced inner peace, but how long have we stayed there? How often have we been moved away from this experience by some event that happened in our lives? Someone cries, we go to console them, someone's angry with us, so we move into a defensive mode... all of these actions literally give away your personal power of choice. Which is why it's time for us to decide which behavioural patterns work best for us, repeat them frequently, and live them. If it works for you, then fantastic... if it doesn't... Then that's fantastic too. Just realize, and never forget that there are other options for you. Peace / Joy / Love is only a small (but frequent) decision away.

Exciting Feedback

Today I've received some amazing feedback on Book 1, the story is captivating, pulls you in, and links together extremely well. The fantasy scapes are intriguing, exciting, and make you want to continue reading.

I've given a working copy to a close friend, and allowed them to read it over their vacation out to B.C., which has proven to be very helpful in the process. Her expertise in certain areas will also lend towards authenticity in parts, as I aim to make this series as realistic as possible, yet with a healthy blend of imagination. I've thoroughly researched many facets of the story, while others are based on my own experience, insights, and perspective.

I'm very pleased, as this is my first attempt at allowing another person to review cover to cover - which is definitely a process I will continue to employ going forward. Right now, chapters 1 - 14 are complete, totaling just over 75,000 words. I anticipate having chapters 15 - 19 (or more) finished by the end of January.

I have had some other input into seperate pieces of the story, however none as helpful in terms of continuity, general story flow, and plot summary. Thank you!

The next few months are going to be hectic however, as I'm moving to a new condo, and changing jobs, among other things.

Monday, December 12, 2005

The Trilogy

A story exists in all of us, but not all of us can articulate it... Not all of us have the time, the energy, the confidence, the intention to tell that story. But in my case, it has been a life long ambition, it is something I knew I would do since I was a young man, something that I've prepared for, for over 10 years, and something that I'm doing right now. The name of the trilogy will not be disclosed until the date I publish, however the project is very much active, book 1 will be completed within the next couple of months. More to come on that later... thanks for reading.

It Whispers First...

Perceiving the universe, is like looking out from the inside of a marble. There's so much more going on than we actually realize. We look at a rock and we think it is one thing, we smash it open to reveal it's nature, petrified sand... It seems static to us. This immovable mover, this aspect of life. Yet is it actually static? Viewing a rock with an electron microscope reveals something awesome, something very interesting... The molecules of a rock itself are moving extremely fast. Extremely fast in relation to the whole. Even the rock itself, our static reference point, is shaped over time. And the rock itself is moving, at an incredible rate, simply forming... And in each moment becoming what it is. A rock. This is the nature of the universe... There is an order to that rock, a system with which it correlates, a process in which it follows. Yet for us with our limited myopic perspective, this might seem irrelevant... What does this have to do with me? That understanding won't help me with anything!!! But perhaps the molecules of the rock, are thinking the same thing.

The universe will whisper, it will guide you, it will show you things in a myriad of ways, in fantastic ways, in coincidental ways, in marvelous ways... And will do so many times over. They may come as opportunities, or suggestions, or a chance lyric of a song, or the reading of an article may contain the secrets to the universe. Your universe, your reality... And the universe knows this, and will continue to help guide you back to yourself. It will lead you back to your own knowing, your own inner wisdom, your own sense of peace and purpose. It has been said... Search within, or you go without, a simple but profound truth.

The day I woke up...

When I refer to the day I woke up, it really refers to the period of my life where I woke up, when I became aware. Aware of what? That's the question that sometimes takes a life time to answer. Am I philosophical? Actually I'm very methodical, and functional... I use what works. I employ what works... whether it be a computer system, a methodology, a process, or a concept for life. For me, point of view or perspective is of the utmost importance. Because it is your perspective that creates your next thought about a thing. For example, imagine a woman whose scared to drive, perhaps she had a bad experience, and now carries a bad association with driving. Now imagine the feeling she has whenever she gets into a car, if her associations carry enough weight, then she'll begin to experience fear, or discomfort. Basically engaging the pre-scripted behavioural patterns associated with her experience about driving. Now imagine what her perspective or outlook on driving might be. It is fear based, that's clear. She experiences discomfort, perhaps panic. Because her originating or sponsoring thought about driving happens to be negative, or is the source for bad experience, her next thought about driving will undoubtedly be negative. This is simply one example of how a perspective on an experience, can create predictable behavioural responses, which essentially creates your next experience. If your perspective is objective (which is nearly impossible) and open minded, live for the moment, and choose to experience joy / peace / love in every moment, regardless of what happens to be going on physically... then you've learned the ability to master the moment. To master your behavioural response, this has the power to create your next experience, in any arena, in any field, in anyway. The implications of having the ability to master your own next moment, your own next experience, regardless of what life brings you, no matter who yells, no matter who demoralizes you, no matter what joy or what event comes into your moment, DECIDE ahead of time how you're going to respond. And learn how to master your emotions, and choose which ones you like. Of course there are always cases of those who (often deny this) decide their favorite state of consciousness, or experience is negative. And that might not make sense... why would someone want to knowingly experience something negative? There are many reasons why that might be, but that does not rob them of the ability to choose how to feel next. For example, I had a very long conversation with my grandmother at one point, while on a family vacation in Mexico, which reaffirmed much of my theory on behavioural science, as I reached a wall in our talk. I got to the basics of her personality, I understood why she has a negative perspective on life, why she's complained about her son for years, why she's always wanted to go back to the old country, and generally why she's formed such a bleak outlook on life. After I listened intently for hours, being genuinely interested in every detail of her story, spoken from experience of a woman who was in her prime years ago, I came to a realization. After I dissected much of her complaints about coming to this country, which has in reality given her a fantastic life, her explanation was "that's just the type of person I am". I was amazed at that simple explanation of her negativity. Type of person, perhaps that type is determined by a choice, or series of choices, and reinforced behavioural conditioning over long periods of time, thus creating a "type" of person. Sometimes such conditioned responses to similar situations tend to seem like you have no power at all, you're literally programmed to respond that way, and although you always have the choice to decide another response, however the probability that you will choose differently isn't likely because tendencies have already been created.