Often in my travels I have come across those whose difficulties seem insurmountable. Those whose struggle with conflict seems to take on a myriad of forms within their various relationships. Often the root of the matter eludes them, even though it is the same cause for all of their various effects. Either it's in the form of "I'm battling with my boyfriend" or "I'm in a difficult way with my mother" ... or some other form of conflict.
Because we live in a world with ego, we cannot help but battle between ourselves. Especially as the ego clings to "rightness" and at the same time stomps out any chance for reconciliation or peace of mind. When you are right, someone else has to be wrong, and no one is happy. The mind fights to be right, while the heart chooses peace. The heart looks for unity and joining together, while the mind attempts to separate based on beliefs and previously learned ideas or misinterpreted principles. It is here that we find a conflict, not only between each other, but within ourselves. One the one hand, we want peace, we want serenity, we want a struggle free life, yet in the other the mind wants to be right and fights against all odds to do so. The form of the conflict is not important, as we have examples of this in our everyday lives, of which there are too many to even mention. Conflict is everywhere, at the macro level of our societal conflicts, or the micro level of our relationships... and even deeper still within ourselves.
We judge ourselves, from some misguided belief that judgement yields something of value... perhaps a discussion point as you make someone else the object of your judgements, or as tool in dismantling your own self-esteem. Nothing good can come of judging someone elses behaviours, but much can be learned from simple observation - without an egotistical need to compare them with yourself or others. It can be difficult, because we live in a world of judgement... but we also live in a world of conflict. With wars ever present, no one has bother to give peace a chance. Give the heart its due... and make the choice for peace.
If you make the choice for peace, you can "let" the other person be right... in whatever situation you find yourself in. They can be right... for what do you care if they think whatever they do? The end result is the conflict stops. The peace begins, and the heart is restful and undisturbed.
Would you rather be in some deep rooted painful state, as your mind knows you're "right" as you've just trampled the hell out of your opponent? You've judged them and made them "wrong" and by doing so, you've made no one happy... save the momentary ego delight you might revel in. It's not worth it... because it only perpetuates more conflict. The other person will only be "wrong" for so long before they judge you right back and seek to make you wrong as you've done to them. So let it go... be the noble man/woman and seek peace in your relationships and in your life. Make the choice for peace, and cause another to feel happy, and thus making yourself happy. And perhaps through this... you'll discover you're more alike than you realize... perhaps you'll judge a little less... and observe yourself a little more. A worthy choice indeed.
RG
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